How to cope whilst having a newborn

The last year has been a tricky one in this household, for reasons I won't bore you with but we're pretty sure we musta dropped a mirror at some point! A lot of the stresses we are dealing with are things that we have had no control over, yes those irritating ones that make you really frustrated and stressed.  HELLO car tyres that have had punctures every week since June!! So here are a few of my tips about how to try to prevent yourselves having a nervous breakdown:

Let the bad days be bad.

Like I mentioned up top, sometimes there are going to be shitty days and sometimes there is going to be nothing you can say or do to make those bad days good so just embrace is and try to ride that wave until the next day comes. 

Avoid "if only".  

Of course you will find yourself saying "if only..." on a regular basis, but try to let that thought go because it really does only lead to more stress, or the cycle of negativity as I like to call it! It starts with a mere "if only I hadn't eaten that chocolate bar" and before you know it you're lamenting every chocolate bar you've eaten in your years of being on earth. Don't do it!

Try to get away from the baby.

Okay this is probably quite a subjective one but personally I think "time out" works just as well for adults as it does for children! Understandably when you have other stresses going on, having a new child on top of that can only add to the difficult situation, all it takes is a big nappy change and you can end up feeling like the world is ending. Even if it is only five minutes, take a breather, go for a brisk walk around the block, take yourself to the toilet and take deep breaths.  Do whatever you need to in order to gain some perspective and recover from the relentlessness of whatever you are dealing with!

Have "you" time.

I cannot stress how important it is to maintain that sense of self through the monotony of nappy change s and feeds! In an ideal world meals out just the two of you would be perfect but in this climate not everyone can do that, so any activities pre baby that you used to like to do, PLEASE DO! Films are a really important part of our relationship and we have struggled to get to the cinema or watch films at home all the way through but now Ophelia is sleeping on a more regular routine we are starting to be able to gain that part of "us" back and it makes such a difference!


So there are my main tips for coping with difficult times, let me know of anything you use to help cope!

8 week update

Our little daughter turned eight weeks old on Sunday, madness!

Highs:

• When she smiled for the first time when she was nearly 5 weeks old-it was when we gave her a bath!
• The more she adds noises to her vocabulary- we have OOOhs, UH, AH, LA, MA and these seem to be used to express either happiness or sadness, it's the cutest thing!
•  Her love for tummy time! 
• Her being comforted by us sometimes to stop her crying.
• When I see her stare at her Dad and then when he looks at her, she does the biggest grin!
• The way she grips onto things -e.g. my bra, her dad's tshirts, or friends' hair!
• Her increasingly good head control-now when she lays on our chests she happily holds her head up and turns it to look around.

Lows:

• All of us getting a cold.
• Poor Ophelia spent a lot of today (Tuesday 17th) sleeping to try get over cold but the plus side was that she wanted lots of cuddles.
• THE leakage in Debenhams Cafe (Lauren and I seem to have bad luck at this place!) and then the baby changing room being engaged for HALF AN HOUR (!!).  So I spent that time in the corridor holding baby trying not to get poo on my hands whilst she just slept!

Ophelia's winter wardrobe

I realised that we had quite a lot of cardigans but most of them were pink or purple, I merely mentioned this to Mum and next thing I know she turns up on my doorstep with heaps of bags.  Anyone that knows my mum will know that she tends to go a bit over board in such scenarios, bless her!  But boy am I thankful slash excited because Ophelia now has lots of cardigans for now plus jackets for the colder weather.  Here are some of the things she has been spoilt with!

0-3month

 

Next

Next

3-6 month

TU @ sainsburys

Tesco

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Next

Cool baby Ned

I have some awfully talented people in my life and one of those is the beautiful Alex Davies who is sewing up a storm creating little people clothes! 

What I love about these clothes is that you can tell that she has used only the best fabrics and fastenings, it all feels so very well made. 

Ophelia was rather lucky to receive the most beautiful dress through the post as a present and I must say she does look rather look beautiful.

 

I don't often put Ophelia in dresses, mostly they are a bit of a bugger to get off, but this one is great because it has a popper on each side of the shoulder, which enables a quick lift off! The bow is also poppered, which I think is a really nice touch and could be doubled up as a hair band slash I could steal it!

Here is some of my favourite clothes and accessories out of the other stuff Alex has made and is selling...

 I really wish I had a boy to put in a bow tie so I could get some of these beauties!

 

You can find Alex and Cool baby Ned on Facebook here 

 

Bedtime routine feat Mum & me products

One of two resounding pieces of advice that a lot of my friends with kids have recommended is starting a vague bedtime routine ASAP so little O gets used to knowing when and where she should be going to sleep through the night.  Here is the routine we currently use and for the last two nights she has actually been going down and getting up at the right time that we would expect her to in the long run (we'll just ignore the amount of times she wakes up during that time!).

Bath/Top and tail

We start the routine usually about 6pm by giving Ophelia a bath or a wash down.  We currently use a plastic storage box because she isn't big enough to use the baby bath we have.  She loves the box because she can kick a little bit, which is probably her favourite ever activity! We get her used to the water by first putting water on her face and head whilst clothed in the towel.  Recently i've started putting johnsons baby bath stuff in the bath for her.  I only put a tiny bit in but it makes so many bubbles it is untrue and makes her ridiculously slippery! We also have a few other baby birth stuff which I might use, The Mum & me one seems like it might be better for her in terms of a gentler smell!

Baby massage 

Work were  kind enough to gift us some Cusson's mum and me baby massage oil and sleep tight balm so we thought we'd work them into our bedtime routine.  I started by warming the oil in my hands and asking Ophelia if it was ok to give her a massage. I uncovered her legs first so she didn't cold and put one hand at the top of her leg (wrapped around it) and the other loosely around her ankle.  I then moved the top hand downwards towards ankle and then the other hand the same, continuously.  After her legs I moved onto her tummy; Ophelia suffers from real bad wind that makes her scream, the massage oil claims to help reduce this so I placed one hand on her tum at a time and gently used a downwards pattering motion.  After the massage I used the balm and massaged it into the pulse points on her wrists, all the while Ophelia appeared calm and to enjoy what I was doing.  I then gave her a cuddle to say thank you. 

Pjamas

I'm a big fan of pjamas so it's only right that i'm so strict on this for her! She doesn't actually wear pjamas yet as such but we call her sleepsuits her pjs!

After pjs I usually give her a top up feed and by then if her eyes start to go, I then put her down in her bed to let her get herself to sleep! All that is on a good day! On a bad day she can stay awake for hours afterwards so I try all the usual things, including sometimes swaddling her although this all depends because sometimes she hates the restriction of swaddling.

This routine is so far working well for us, and I'm really hoping it'll pay off dividends in the long term.

Baby outfit of the day

Ophelia wears:

Peter pan collar polka dot top: TU @ Sainsbury's.
Leggings: TU @ Sainsbury's.