Nursery diaries; Week 1

Monday 10th February:
Dropped off at 9am (to avoid Nursery drop off 'rush hour'), Ophelia responded well when I passed her over to her key worker-she immediately smiled at her and went to grab her face (she does this a lot at the moment!).  I gave her a kiss goodbye and left her in the nursery's capable hands whilst I went to distract myself with a task list the length of my arm.  I didn't really think too much about it throughout the day, I had far too many other things to get on with and knew she was in capable hands.  At about 3pm I decided I wanted to do the food shop just in time before picking her up but just as I was scanning my veg I got a call from the nursery.  Ophelia had vomitting and diarrhea and so nursery wanted me to come and pick her up.  At this point I got a bit worried, had I missed signs of something over the weekend? When I collected her she was happy as larry and continued like that until she went to sleep at bedtime.  Understandable for nursery to send her home but I also realised that it was simpy a precautionary measure and perhaps might not have been the case if she had been at nursery a while and they knew her better.  We got our summary of her day and she had drunk all her bottle on both occasions, all of her lunch as well as a banana and rice cakes (which she had neverh had before!)- no wonder she was sick! Nursery fed back that whilst she had cried on some occasions she also enjoyed sitting in an activity ring whilst another child passed her balls to play with.

Tuesday 11th February: 
After no issues following symptoms of illness, I decided it would be okay to take her to nursery again today, this time I dropped her off at her usual time of 8am.  Seeing as drop off went so well yesterday, I decided to use the same technique today and took her all the way into her room, giving her a kiss goodbye.  I was really looking forward to picking her up and was even happier when I got feedback from the staff; she had really enjoyed herself in the sensory room (she loves lights this kid!She is already obsessed with our dimmer switch in our bedroom!) and again loved being in the activity ring.  When I went to collect her, she was sitting with the other children in the soft ball play room, gnawing on a teething toy and oblivious to my arrival.  It was only when I sat right down next to her and talked that she realised I was there and started to cry a little, almost like she suddenly realised I hadn't been there the whole time! I sat in there for a few minutes and it was great to see how she interacted with the staff, smiling at them and reaching for them.  The staff also fedback that she seems really interested in the older children, particularly one girl who she appeared to stare at for quite some time! She had also managed to fit time in her busy schedule to make us a valentine's day card! As well as drinking all of her two bottles, she had a quarter of her weetabix, all of her lunch plus a quarter of her snack.  I'm so happy with how things have been going so far and she is settling in much quicker than I anticipated- I can really see how much she will flourish by going to nursery and it has already had a massive impact on her!

I forgot the details of Wednesday and Friday but she went! I also saw again how she is fine and happy when there until she sees me and then gets upset.  It was one of the children's Birthdays so the nursery tried her on cake, apparently at first she was skeptical but then started wolfing it down. 

Overall I was really happy and impressed with how the week went, much better than I anticipated.  Whilst she had points of crying when there, she already settled into a routine quickly and the periods of crying got less as the week went on.  It really put my mind at ease ready for my return to work, plus she has been having really long naps-wooohoo!

 

Separation anxiety; object permanence

For a while now we have had a little trouble when Ophelia spends time with anyone other than her Mum and Dad, so you can imagine the fun the poor nursery staff are having!

Since Ophelia was a few weeks old she has regulaly spent time with a variety of family and friends, both with and without us. About once a month my mum usually has Ophelia for a few hours whilst we go to the cinema but just before Christmas Ophelia began crying when with her. At first I thought it was one of the many normal baby issues,  but it has become apparent that it is when she is not with us.  As soon as I worked this out, I was keen to find a way to reduce this happening, I've always wanted to encourage confidence in her so tried praising her when she didn't cry/positive reinforcement etc but it didn't seem to make a difference.   I was keen to encourage people to carry on holding her when she cried because she was getting into a pattern of crying and only stopping if I held her.  I then tried to help increase her trust with people by sitting her near me but get others to interact and play with her-so she knew I was still there but that those people could be trusted.   The biggest improvement I have seen is this weekend, where she has displayed no such displays and instead showed a normal level of comfort.  I attribute most of this improvement to a combinationof things; reassurance using above techniques, playing peekaboo, and attending nursery.  Don't get me wrong, she has cried whilst settling into nursery but she is now hopefully starting to realise that when I leave her, I'm not going away forever!

I had a discussion with both Ophelia's Aunt (nursery staff) and the nursery staff in regard to all this and apparently it's quite normal and is a sign of object permanence (understanding objects etc exist even when they can't be seen).  Interestingly this doesn't usually happen for a few months.  This really put my mind at ease and I think it's a much more positive way to look at it. Fingers crossed she ll grow up tobe a confident, independent lady-i think nursery will help massively with that.

Did you have any similar issues? 

The Nursery search

So it happened. Rather too quickly from start to finish.  This little madam is officially enrolled at Nursery from February 4 full days a week.  Callum found out he had a job just before Christmas and on New years day (after the hubbub of the festive season had died down) it suddenly dawned on me that we really needed to look at nurseries quite urgently! I also realised that not many people blog in detail about the process, difficulties, questions etc so I will!

First of all, get a feeler out about how long waiting lists are in your area ASAP because you can never be too safe! I'm quite lucky in that the waiting lists where I live are either non existant or low, but someone told me that they are a YEAR in their area! A YEAR!!

We sat down and worked out firstly what days/how many days we needed the nursery to provide-think about if these days are flexible or if you need the nursery to have adhoc sessions.  Again, we are lucky where we live that nurseries offer both.  Once this was established, I set above researching nurseries in the local area and noting their attributes on a spreadsheet for easy comparison:

 

Weigh up what is most important to you; 

Do you want it to be close to home or work? 

Do you need long days? 

Do you want them to provide formula/food/nappies/wipes/cream? 

Do they need to have an Outstanding on Ofsted?
Do you want them to be with children of the same age?
Do you want value for money or would you rather pay a bit extra?
Do they accept salary sub childcare vouchers?


The next step for us was a visit, I would suggest making a list of questions to ask, e.g.-
How many children do they enrol in that age group at a time?
What is the staff/child ratio?
What is the timetable/curriculum?
What do they do to encourage ___ (walking/crawling/sitting)?
What is their discipline policy?
Do they have buggy storage? Is there a charge?
What nappies/formula etc do they use?


Just a quick pointer, I would suggest paying attention to the level that things are placed at (e.g. are the tables kid sized or adult sized)- I didn't think about this until our nursery pointed this out and now I can see just how important for child's development this is even from a young age.

I only visited 2 nurseries but I knew immediately that the second one was "The one".  I came away from the first nursery thinking that we would probably end up choosing it, but the second one made me notice how many flaws the other had or more the massive gap between "good" and "outstanding".  Lets just say, the second one had a bloody soft play ball pit room that they go in every day, for god's sake! But in seriousness, the manager of the second just seemed much more passionate about the nursery and I really did buy into the ethos! It means we have ended up going for the more expensive option but unlike the first nursery, this one has;
-biodegradable nappies plus formula included in the price
-the staff have all been there at least 4 years and are all mums themselves (whereas the first nursery had high turnover and young)
-all the staff are trained (first one had high numbers of untrained)
-High staff to child ratio so that they get one on one (whereas other nursery was 1:3).
-Goes up to pre school age and each age have high emphasis on development,sensory and imagination

I'll stop this post here but if you have any questions please feel free to ask as I have lots more to say! How did you find picking a nursery? I went on a roller coaster of emotions (first I wanted her to go, then I didn't) but am now so excited for her to start, all because of the standard of the nursery! She is going to learn so much there, I cannot wait to see! I am however, awfully dreading the period and times that she is inconsolable when I leave her there (those tears!) but I just have to rationalise it and remember that it part of being a parent-knowing when to let them go and give them independence in order for them to develop-can't keep her holed up in my arms forever!

Nursery: Woodland

At the moment Ophelia is in her cot in our room but when we have our own place we shall be putting her in her very own room.  She already has a mobile with toadstools and some animals on it, plus my Mum has saved my old baby cupboards and dressing table which were passed down from my Nan-they happen to have rabbits on...so i'm gonna go with a woodland animal theme I reckon (lazy!).

Here are a few ideas for how to decorate the Nursery:

Clockwise L-R: Owl lamp, bookcase, knitted fox, nursery woodland art, nursery woodland art,  wooden quote.

There is also a rather fabulous toadstool nightlight from White Rabbit England that i've got my eye on too!